Transcription
Bobbi Rebell:
wnup. And you know what? Being a grownup is really hard, especially when it comes to money, but it's okay, we're going to get there together. I'm going to bring you one money story from a Financial Grownup, one lesson, and then my take on how you can make it your own. We got this.
Bobbi Rebell:
Hey friends, before we get into today's money story, which is a good one, I just want to take a moment to thank so many of you that have been subscribing and writing reviews, and just writing to me, giving me your feedback. If you have time please support the podcast by sharing with a friend, and helping to get more people involved. I know you guys are super busy. If you have time, reviews on iTunes are the best, and of course, be in touch through social media. I am @bobbirebell on Twitter, and @bobbirebell1 on Instagram.
Bobbi Rebell:
Okay, now the show. At first, I thought this episode was going to be about splitting up, about letting go of people, but then I realized, we're actually talking about letting go of stuff, and the emotions tied to stuff. When relationships end it can be messy and with all the emotions going on, in many cases, actual logistics need to get done. Someone needs to actually move out, and then the stuff has to be divided. It's really a mess.
Bobbi Rebell:
Our natural instinct is to fight for what's ours, or to just walk away. Fight or flight, something like that, I don't know. So listen closely my friends, to what my guest has to say. If you are a fan of money podcasts you already know her, Certified Financial Planner Shannah Compton Game is the host of Millennial Money, one of my favorite podcasts, and of course, I am so grateful that I was privileged to be a guest when my book was released. This is a great story, here is Shannah Compton Game.
Bobbi Rebell:
Shannah Compton Game, you are Financial Grownup, and someone I am learning so much from, welcome to the program.
Shannah Game:
Ah! I'm so excited to be here!
Bobbi Rebell:
And congratulations. Millennial Money, one of my favorite podcasts, has reached the three year mark. I see it frequently in the top 100 charts. What's going on with the show?
Shannah Game:
Yeah, the show is just, it keeps growing and growing, and it's so exciting that more and more people I think are getting really passionate and enthusiastic about taking ownership over their finances. It baffles me that people around the world are that excited about learning about money, but it's so exciting that they are.
Bobbi Rebell:
And one of the things that I love about the show is you've branched out beyond the standard topics, you even do a lot of shows on things like travel, speaking of global.
Shannah Game:
Absolutely. You know, I feel that money is such a tough subject to talk about anyway. People are looking for a more well rounded view of money, of thinking about their life, and so, yeah, we try to touch on travel, and we try to touch on other stories. Of, whether it's Michelin Star Chefs, or authors, or musicians, or entrepreneurs. People that are just sharing their story, sharing their journey. Also, I think it helps connect to the audience and show that we're all more alike, regardless of income, than we are different.
Bobbi Rebell:
And it's also about getting very real, which brings us to the money story that you're going to share, you walked away from all your assets. That just blows my mind, tell your story and then we'll explain what happened.
Shannah Game:
Yeah, I was early in my 30s and had to make a very strong life choice, and decided that walking away from my assets, from a relationship and a situation I was in was worth the downside, and that's very hard being a certified financial planner because I'm used to giving people money advice, telling them how to grow their wealth. It was a very weird situation to be in, where I was looking at alternatives, and it made more financial sense actually for me to walk away from everything than it did to do the alternative in that situation.
Shannah Game:
I think what's cool about sharing that story, initially it was hard for me, but I think sharing that story shows people that life is not all upside, there's a lot of downside, and sometimes you have to make tough choices like that, but life goes on and it's all going to be okay.
Bobbi Rebell:
And the truth is, when you have something like that, that's so cataclysmic, the reality is if you're strong you can always earn money. You need your freedom, and the freedom, it's so cliché to say this, but your freedom really is priceless. You could always go back out and earn money, that's why I tell people when I was divorced at 30, and happily remarried, but I tell people, you can always go out and earn more money.
Bobbi Rebell:
Don't spend years of your life being angry, being in a divorce battle with somebody that you're never going to resolve things with financially. Everyone gets the short end of the stick financially in a divorce, that's just the way the math is. So extract yourself from the situation and focus on your strengths, and the fact that you can rebuild your life, and you did that.
Shannah Game:
Yes, and I mean, it's very cliché to say, but things are really just things. I don't think that there's any better way to learn that lesson than to literally give up all of your things and realize that they don't have any power over your life, they don't have power over your happiness, and yeah, you can make more money. You can reinvent yourself. You can pull yourself up from virtually nothing.
Shannah Game:
I mean, I felt like I had just walked out of college again and was starting from scratch, but really through that experience it gave me time to think about who I really am. What is my path? What are my talents? What are my strengths? And what do I want my life to look like? Through those hard times and those hard decisions I think I was really able to shape the career and the direction that I have now.
Bobbi Rebell:
So what is the lesson for our listeners?
Shannah Game:
What I've learned personally, and what I've learned through working with so many different people with their finances, that money really is a tool. It's a tool to give you options in life, and having options is a good thing. So maybe turning negativity about budgeting or about saving money, turning that into a positive, and really seeing that managing your money, and being smart with your money is really a tool for you to be able to achieve all of those really cool things that you want to do in life.
Bobbi Rebell:
While I have you here let's just do one personal finance tip. One money tip that you and your husband use in your daily lives, that people can really put to work immediately.
Shannah Game:
Absolutely, so whether you make $30,000 or whether you make $30,000,000, the most impactful thing you can do for your finances, and it sounds so basic and yet it will revolutionize your goals, it will revolutionize your future, is something I call knowing your numbers. It's really the process of figuring out where the cash is going that you've got. When you can find patterns and when you can redirect spending that you're already spending your money on, then you can put it towards debt pay-off. You can put it towards buying that house, you can put it towards all of those amazing goals that you have.
Bobbi Rebell:
The information gives you the power to make the decision, whatever that decision is?
Shannah Game:
Absolutely, and you have two choices. You can either keep spending the money the way you're spending it, or you can make a different choice and put some sort of boundary around that spending, and then redirect that cash towards something else. It really gives you ownership, I call it empowering your bank account. You're really the CEO of your finances and I think if you put that hat on it's really going to help you look at managing your money in a whole different way.
Bobbi Rebell:
Alright, we're all going to put our CEO of the household hats on. I feel like that's calling for some kind of logo wear.
Shannah Game:
Absolutely.
Bobbi Rebell:
[crosstalk 00:08:30] CEO right? Alright, thank you so much Shannah Compton Game, Certified Financial Planner and host of Millennial Money. You're the best, thanks for joining us.
Shannah Game:
Thank you.
Bobbi Rebell:
Alright friends, here's my take, and some of it may surprise you. Financial Grownup tip number one, I'm going to disagree in a tiny way with Shannah. Well, maybe not that tiny, only because not everyone is in her position. Not everyone is a certified financial planner, not everyone can support themselves the way that she can immediately, although we should all work towards that.
Bobbi Rebell:
Don't necessarily jump the gun in giving up the big stuff when it comes to splitting up, especially if you're coming off a long term relationship where maybe one spouse took a back seat career-wise to the other for the better of the couple, but now that person is left in a vulnerable position.
Bobbi Rebell:
Even though Shannah is happy with her decision, when it comes to major assets from a relationship, and maybe things like spousal support or child support in a breakup, you need to take it seriously. Be as direct and efficient as much as possible, don't spend your life in court, but if you or your kids are going to need an asset, or support, now and in the future, and you are entitled, make sure you and your lawyer do fight for what you deserve.
Bobbi Rebell:
Financial Grownup tip number two, divorce is going to wreck you, destroy you emotionally. That's a given, in fact that's true of many relationship breakups, but you can get caught up obsessing about the little stuff, especially when it comes to just wanting to prove a point, or get back at somebody. When you can, try to detach and kind of see the silliness in all of it. True story, as some of you know, I had a brief marriage in my 20s, we were literally splitting up wedding gifts. I mean, who gets the china, who gets the silver, stuff that was literally, I kid you not, still wrapped up in the original gift wrap from the store.
Bobbi Rebell:
So anyway, among the things that my ex demanded was the food, drinks, and cleaning supplies that we had in our tiny one bedroom New York City apartment. A little weird but, okay, I gave it to him. So anyway, about a week later these giant boxes arrived from Costco. They were a gift from my moms friend Martha, who, by the way, has a side hustle as a comedian. The boxes were filled with giant tubs of cleaning supplies, and condiments, we're talking everything from Windex, laundry detergent, ketchup, mustard, mayo, you can imagine. A year's supply!
Bobbi Rebell:
Not only did it help me smile for the first time in what seemed like forever, and also, did save me from having to buy that stuff for like a year. So, thank you Martha. Alright, thanks to all of you for listening to this episode. I hope you got a lot of value from Shannah's story. I adore her and always listen to Millennial Money, and hope you will too.
Bobbi Rebell:
Go to my website, bobbirebell.com, and signup for my newsletter. I'm going to be sending it out a little bit more regularly, at many people's request, to keep you more informed about what is going on with the podcast. And also, of course, please follow me on Twitter, @bobbirebell, and on Instagram, @bobbirebel1, and let me know what you think of the show. Reviews, as I mentioned before, always truly appreciated. I hope you enjoyed this episode with my friend Shannah and that we all got one step closer to being Financial Grownups.
Bobbi Rebell:
Financial Grownup with Bobbi Rebell is edited and produced by Steve Stewart, and is a [BRK Media 00:12:08] production.
